370 Days is the number of days I have been back in Los Angeles.
Easy it has not been.
It has been one obstacle and challenge after another.
Still questioning if retuning was the right choice.
When I left and said goodbye to Los Angeles in 2009, I WAS DONE.
I really did not expect it to be as hard as it has been. I thought with living here for 23 years and creating whatever life that I had created would help make the transition easier upon my return.
THAT HAS NOT BEEN THE CASE.
My plan was to come back to Los Angeles and work.
WORK FOR MONEY
WORK FOR SELF AWARENESS
WORK FOR RECONCILLING ISSUES OF THE PAST
WORK FOR SELF PRESERVATION
WORK TO SURVIVE
WORK CREATIVELY
WORK
JUST WORK SIMPLY WORK.
Work has been so scarce and sporadic for me. I have managed to get by with much struggle.
I know there ia a LESSON in all of this.
I believe this struggle that I have been faced with and continue to be faced with is for me to realize that I need to TRUST AND BELIEVE that I am worthy of living the life of my dreams. Not just thinking it but REALLY B E L I E V I N G IT.
I need to REFOCUS on what I want and work towards that GOAL. If I refocus my energies I believe that I will see PROGRESS.
I always deplete my energies by spending precious TIME PURSUING THE LIFE OF SURVIVAL which takes away form LIVING THE LIFE OF PASSION AND MY DREAMS.
I have wasted so much time and energy stuck in FEAR
FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL.
It sucks.
The time is now to live FEARLESSLY.
Trusting the next 365 +++++++++++++ DAYS MY ENERGIES WILL BE SPENT CREATING THE LIFE I WANT TO LIVE RATHER THAN THE LIFE I THINK I NEED TO LIVE.
REACH FOR THE STARS.
PEACE AND BLESSINGS
SURROUND YOURSELF WITH BEAUTY AND ENERGY THAT SUPPORTS YOU ON YOUR JOURNEY. LIFE IS TO BE LIVED. ENJOY .
